1-800-Got-Junk: the best business model

Any one else guilty of following the 1-800-Got-Junk people around their house screaming “PURGE, PURGE, PURGGEEE?!”

No, just me? It’s cool. Today is one of my favorite days of the year. IT IS JUNK PURGING DAY, BAYBAY.

First, if you’re not familiar with the 1-800-Got-Junk business model, let me enlighten you with what I consider to be singlehandedly the BEST business model I have ever seen/experienced. It’s literally a dump truck, that shows up to your house empty, besides two burly men (I assume women work here also, but I’ve never witnessed it). Then you show said burly men around your nasty, junk-filled house, and they take all of the crap you point out to them to their truck to NEVER be seen again.

IT IS THE GREATEST THING EVER. They charge you by the amount of truck you fill up and we normally spend anywhere between $300-$500.. and I swear it is by FAR the best money we will spend in 2021. (Minus wedding stuff – do not panic, parents!) Total time spent? 30 minutes or less. I am not playing, it is the most bang for your buck that you can get out there… in the ENTIRE world.

You are probably starting to think that 1-800-Got-Junk is sponsoring this blog post. But no, I am just really this big of a fan ðŸĪĢ. Plus, I’m not sure this blog has the type of pull that gets sponsorships. But 1-800-Got-Junk, if you’re out there, and you want a dashing review, you are FREE to pull any of these words and slap them on your website. Consider it my gift to you, you little peace-bringers. 😘

With that all aside, you are now probably really starting to wonder how two people (Matt and I) really create that much “junk” that we need this to be an annual occurrence? The truth is this… ONE of us, who shall remain unnamed, apparently does not believe in garbage cans. So much so that if the other ONE of us did not exist, our house would be one minuscule step away from episode of hoarders. We already collect dogs 😉 Regardless of who’s fault it is (Matt’s ðŸĪŠ) there really is nothing better than taking a day and getting rid of old crap. It’s cleansing for the house, it’s cleansing for the soul.

So.. what did we get rid of? Our couch. Literally, we now just have an electric fireplace and a massive dog bed in our living room. It creates a certain ambiance… the type of ambiance that says “do not come over, we do not have seating for you, but please send your dog.” We got rid of doors and their casings, 5 of them to be exact, which were just sitting in our extra room.. collecting dust and stressing me out. We got rid of our giant collection of tree limbs that we had trimmed off our trees in APRIL. Also, I finally gave up on Matt’s pipe dream of having a bonfire for him. I’ve been with the man for 4.5 years, we’ve been prepping for a “bonfire” for the entire duration of that time together, and today… today was the day we kissed that dream goodbye. I am not sad. Oh, and we got rid of all our broken porch furniture. ðŸĪ·ðŸŧ‍♀ïļ sorry neighbors, we’re about to be respectable human beings here any second now.. brace yourselves!

It’s stupid. I mean, I know that it’s just stuff, but seeing it go, feels like a weight off my chest. I know we could dump it ourselves, and if we did, we could get rid of the junk sooner, but… let’s be real, that takes a level of adult-functioning and organization that we are simply not partaking in at this juncture in life. We have things to do, cleaning up tree limbs is not part of the daily grind.. at the moment. If that’s ridiculous to you, I agree… it is ridiculous, but it’s also honest, sincere and genuine. I don’t want to do it.

So instead, we call 1-800-Got-Junk, they show up, and they take 30 minutes out of their day to change my entire life outlook. Sometimes, it just feels good to purge. ðŸĪ·ðŸŧ‍♀ïļ

As I sit here, watching them carry our tattered furniture out of the house, I have to admit, I fueled a fire within me. I have already gone through clothes/closets, but next on the list… junk drawers. It’s trash day on Tuesday.. and junk has got to go. We are going to be sitting in an empty house by Tuesday at the rate my brain is going.

Not to get overly meta on everyone, but I’ve also been thinking about a mental purge. Like, using this instance/experience as a visual representation of purging my stress, my anxiety, and all the things that are beyond my control, from my brain. I can’t help that Lucy is sick, and worrying about it, just steals the happiness of our days left. I can’t help that our builder may never show up again and we may have lost all that money on our doors/trim, but I can help my attitude about it all. There’s a lot of things beyond my control, that take up a lot of space in my brain, that really just do not belong there. I am a hoarder of mental “junk”. It’s time to purge all of that “junk” too.

So that’s what I did, between screaming “Purge, Purge, Purge” and pointing out junk, I dumped my own junk in that dump truck. I had to do it secretly, of course, because I cannot have the 1-800-Got-Junk people thinking I am crazier than they already do, but somewhere in that dump truck, wedged between chewed couch cushions is a bucket of work stress. Somewhere in that dump truck, maybe under the pile of tree limbs, is canine lymphoma. Somewhere in that dump truck, probably stacked between broken chairs, is the daily bullshit my mind likes to obsess over – things like fear of loss, fear of being a disappointment, fear of failure. Then the dump truck just drove off – no heavier with my “added junk”, and yet somehow, I am so much lighter.

I purged the junk. I don’t know how long this visual representation will do the trick for me, or if it will last at all, but I plan enjoy every second of peace that it has brought me in the right now. The dump can have that junk, it does not benefit me. We may be down furniture or “junk”, but we are up so much more in free space, less clutter, and less odor retention (our couch was NASTY, y’all!). All of those things bring me peace of mind, comfort, and a tiny bit more mental stability.

I’m telling you, you gotta get the stability where you can. Call 1-800-Got-Junk, get rid of the junk, and feel BETTER. You are your only hindrance (screaming this at myself, I promise).

Sunny daze ahead, sweet friends (most likely). 🌞

THE BEST OF THE BEST
Soul = cleansed

Published by SunnyDazeAhead

Well... it's happening, due to high demand, and my monstrous ego, I've decided to blog. Simply put, I can't imagine who wouldN'T want to read my crazy antics and get to know the inner-workings of my semi-stable brain. Maybe, you'll laugh (hopefully, WITH me). Maybe you'll cry or maybe you'll get bored. It's really up to you what you take from this, all I can promise is brutal honesty, a heavy dose of sarcasm, some cuss words (I am who I am, sorry dad), and a little insanity. My mom has also recommended I share some of my recipes.. so maybe that too. The face behind the blog is... hard to put into words and words are "kinda" my thing. I am loud, I am outspoken, I am silly, I am sarcastic. I am wildly defensive of my loved ones. I have an anxious mind and I spend a LOT of time trying to keep my brain from spiraling into worst case scenarios. I work hard to keep my mind a happy, optimistic place, which I have come to realize is not my mind's natural habitat. I spend almost all my time with my three dogs: Lucy, Brantley, and Zeppelyn, who I am convinced are the greatest beings on the planet. I probably love my parents TOO much, but I am blessed to share a very close friendship with both and it is REALLY important to me that I never take that for granted. I love a boy, I have loved the same boy for years now, and I moved for him and honestly; home is where he is. Fine, his name is Matt and he is most definitely TAKEN, so back off ladies. I am a KC Native; a Jayhawk by choice, and an Omaha- Transplant. I spent my entire life telling everyone I was going to be a doctor, only to turn out to be an attorney in the scheme of things (I am proud of that, it is just not where I saw my life going). I am often convinced that I should have been born in a small town (John Cougar Mellencamp- Style) and any part of my heart not occupied by the dogs and Matt, is occupied by the late, but no less great Star, my horse/partner/best friend of 15 years. That's right, I am a former "Horse Hottie" and it is one of my favorite things about myself. Otherwise, I try to be a kind, generous, and a good person. Sometimes, I think I am misunderstood, and other times, I am understood a little too well. My face will tell you anything that I SOMEHOW manage to filter my mouth from saying. Oh, and I think I need all baby animals: zoo animals, farm animals, ALL the animals. That should pretty much wrap it up -- I'm Ashley; Enneagram: Whatever. In truth, I don't know what my mission is here. I don't foresee myself saving lives, talking people off the ledge, or providing sage, creative or original life advice. I am not a parent, so parenting-advice shall not be offered. I avoid controversial topics like the plague, I don't have the urge to lead you to the Lord (but he is pretty cool if you are open to the idea), and I have no idea on how to teach, craft, DIY, counsel, or even really advise. But I can repeat what I have learned, I can tell stories, and (sometimes) I can make people laugh. Writing makes me happy. I hope my writing makes you happy. So buckle up, strap in, glue your helmet to your damn head, empty your bladder and do whatever it is that you have to do to prepare for a ride.. a wild ride. A star-studded, bronc bucking, rodeo type of ride... my very favorite type. 💃🏞 Sunny daze ahead friends, probably. âĪïļ

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