There was an elephant butthole on my kitchen wall. Smack in the center of the kitchen, a real eye catcher. But let me back up real quick.. You will never meet anyone that has worse luck than Matt and I when it comes to home projects. I thought it was just Matt, but he seemsContinue reading “The Elephant Butt”
Tag Archives: funny
I’m tired of feelings
I’m tired of feelings. I don’t know if the title of the post gave this away, but I’m just straight up OVER IT this week. Normally, I would really try to dive into that, and diagnose precisely why I feel tired of feelings, and then offer up some (maybe) useful hints to love/appreciate feelings again.Continue reading “I’m tired of feelings”
One dog, two dog; blue fish, blue fish (a bad Dr. Seuss rip off):
One time, Matt abandoned me. FOUR WHOLE DAYS. Just me, like a free-range chicken, with 96 hours wide open and not a plan in sight. Technically, he abandoned me AND the dogs, but they seemed way less hurt by the abandonment and carried on as life as normal so.. they don’t count as victims ofContinue reading “One dog, two dog; blue fish, blue fish (a bad Dr. Seuss rip off):”
Don’t cry over spilt Mountain Dew.
I’m pretty sure that’s how the quote goes, or at least, it’s close enough for me. Who likes milk these days anyways? The title hits close to home. I’ve had a WEEK at work, despite taking a vacation day Monday and it only being Wednesday. 🙈🤣 it’s one of those “there’s 100 ways this issueContinue reading “Don’t cry over spilt Mountain Dew.”
A series of seemingly unrelated events that almost created a catastrophe: a story of sorts.
You. All. BUCKLE UP. I have an “Ashley-only” type of story to share with you, the kind that seems unbelievable, that involves like 900 seemingly unrelated parts, but still.. somehow ends up related, disturbing, and sort of hilarious. I’m actually super proud of this particular story, because while it’s absolutely Ashley-esque, Matt is the protagonistContinue reading “A series of seemingly unrelated events that almost created a catastrophe: a story of sorts.”
Firm opinions about absolutely nothing 🌞
Things seem bleak. Things ARE bleak. It seems like people are more divided, feelings are more hurt, anger and hate is permeating into every aspect of life. Personal lives, relationships, careers, friendships are being tested and pushed.. and after 2020, we kinda needed a break. As you know, or you should know, I refuse toContinue reading “Firm opinions about absolutely nothing 🌞”